Everyone is excited about the final season of Game of Thrones, premiering this Sunday on HBO.
The network.
The fans.
The content creators.
And most of all: the brands.
Indeed, nobody has enjoyed the run-up to GoT more than the companies scrambling to incorporate the universally-beloved series into products they can sell. According to AdWeek, over 100 brands have partnered with Game of Thrones, on everything from promotional soda cans to underwear.
Some of this stuff is actually pretty cool; some of it is decidedly not. Thus: an incomplete ranking of all that Game of Thrones shit.
Our scoring is based on two main criteria: the strength of the GoT tie-in and the strength of the product itself. Both were judged on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being "wtf is this" and 10 being "where do I give my money." Please note: in order to stay sane, we've limited the field to partnerships that feature a product you may actually want to buy.
To Westeros, we go...
10. Game of Thrones x MLB Bobbleheads
It's not like MLB bobbleheads made a whole lot of sense before this partnership. And yet...
Strength of tie-in: 2
Strength of product: 0
Total score: 2
9. Game of Thrones x The Source Weed
This Las Vegas dispensary is offering a strain of "uplifting, indica-dominant" weed with "sweet, piney flavors," known as the White Walker OG. Weed nomenclature has always been a bit of a racket—and I'll give credit where credit is due for the dispensary for taking advantage of that fact—but the folks selling this (at least in the press release) didn't even attempt to make a connection between this particular strain and the show.
Strength of tie-in: 1
Strength of product: 4(?)
Total score: 5
8. Game of Thrones x MeUndies
Ahem. These are dragon boxers, not Game of Thrones boxers. Big difference.
Strength of tie-in: 2
Strength of product: 4
Total score: 6
7. Game of Thrones x Vintage Estate Wines
The Oregon-based winery expanded their line last year, adding a pinot noir to a mix that already included a cabernet sauvignon, a red blend and chardonnay. Sure, the wine is probably fine. But you can't just slap a GoT-related label on it and call it Game of Thrones wine. I mean, you can. But still.
Strength of tie-in: 3
Strength of product: 5
Total score: 8
6. Game of Thrones x Oreos
Point: These Oreos have actual GoT embossments on them. Counterpoint: They're still just Oreos. Counterpoint-point: Oreos are dope, though.
Strength of tie-in: 5
Strength of product: 5
Total score: 10
5. Game of Thrones x John Varvatos
We'll give it to them here: they really went for it. Winterfell leather jackets made from 100% sheepskin with an Iron Throne print (pictured). Kingsroad pants. This linen henley-esque shirt-jacket thing...But while we admire their dedication, the design skews more Halloween than everyday. Also, most of the pieces look like clothes a pick-up artist would advise you to wear to a club.
Strength of tie-in: 8
Strength of product: 3
Total score: 11
4. Game of Thrones x Adidas
Adidas has released a few UltraBoosts shoes in color schemes representing the noble families of the Seven Kingdoms (some are already sold out). Unlike the partnership above, the GoT flourishes here are subtle. More importantly: they're great shoes.
Strength of tie-in: 5
Strength of product: 8
Total score: 13
3. Game of Thrones x Ommegang Brewery
With an emphasis on ales, sours and wine-y flavors—which feels fittingly medieval—Ommegang's five specialty GoT beers all sound pretty damn tasty. As evinced in the picture above, they'd all probably look pretty damn good in a chalice as well.
Strength of tie-in: 6
Strength of product: 8
Total score: 15
2. Game of Thrones x Shake Shack
Through May 19th, Shake Shacks nationwide are offering a Dracarys Burger—a double bacon Monterey Jack cheeseburger with spicy Shack Sauce—and a Dragonglass Shake, "frozen with packed snow harvested beyond the Wall and hand churned by members of the Night's Watch." For good measure, Shake Shack has released its own translation guide, so people can order in Valyrian*.
*Although maybe don't actually order in Valyrian.
Strength of tie-in: 7
Strength of product: 8
Total score: 15
1. Game of Thrones x Diageo
The British spirit producer—which previously launched a White Walker Johnnie Walker scotch, featuring a bottle sleeve that revealed hidden designs when chilled—has released eight new limited-edition single malt scotches, each of which is aligned with a House of Westeros (plus one for the Night's Watch). The pairings are unexpectedly considered. For example, House Stark's whiskey is a single malt from Dalwhinnie; known for being one of Scotland's highest-altitude distilleries, it apparently reflects the resiliency necessary to thrive in Winterfell's frigid conditions. (We also hear it goes down smooth and gets you tipsy.)
Strength of tie-in: 9
Strength of product: 8
Total score: 17
