Given that you’re a noted Macanese food expert, we’ll skip this sexy new Hollywood restaurant serving Kurobuta riblets on two nice patios.

Oh. You’ll humor us?

It’s House of Macau. It’s no house. It’s a double-decker Vine Street place serving opulent Asian food under impressive disco balls. It opens Monday. See it sooner.

Suitably unsubtle start to Hollywood nights here, whether they’re destined to continue to Davey Wayne’s or the Well. Here are four truths and one lie about it.

1. There’s food.
Some shows the varied influences of Macau. Like Portuguese curry chicken and smoked Kurobuta riblets. Riblets are universal. Here’s the menu.

2. And where there’s food, generally there are drinks.
True in this case. Try the Orange Blossom, a sort of Asianized Old Fashioned with orange juice, orange flower bitters, Grand Marnier and orange you glad we... no.

3. There’s a dusky little lounge upstairs.
For drinking said drinks. It’s got that sexy red-and-black thing going on. And lots of sofas.

4. With a massive patio behind it.
It’s huger and fire-pittier than the sidewalk patio. There’s a sidewalk patio.

5. There won’t be any actors here.
Ha.