Meanwhile, at the United Nations...

Chairperson: So the Americans want to revisit this whole gelato thing.

United States: Yeah, well, Boston has Italian gelato. New York has Italian gelato. Even Beverly Hills has some. Point is, Chicago wants theirs. Italy?

Italy: Ask the French.

France: [dramatically slams fist on table] Zut alors!

...

United States: We’ll take that as a yes.

Celebrate the passing of this completely fabricated UN resolution with the very real premiere of Amorino, Chicago’s first Parisian gelato café. It soft-opens tomorrow on the Gold Coast.

Say you’re doing stuff on Oak Street. The birds are chirping. Spring’s warm breath is at your back. All is right with the world. Except...

You could really go for a macchiato and some French macarons stuffed with chef-quality Italian ice cream.

You find this place. You step inside. Before you: a few crystal chandeliers. A cozy leather banquette. Oh, and 16 flavors of the silkiest gelato this side of the Po River. If you’re in the mood for something tart, go with the sorbet. It’s made with lemons from the Amalfi Coast.

If you’re in the mood for something sweet, try the Nutella-like flavor the French call L’inimitable.

The French really seem to like that one.