“Viagra is like Disneyland. An hour-long wait for a two-minute ride.”
—Confucius

... Or maybe he didn’t do the fortune cookies at Red Stixs, a cheeky, sweeping spot for high-level Chinese by way of the Hamptons, open now in Midtown.

These guys just opened the first of these out in Water Mill over the summer, and much like yourself, now they’re here. Let’s just take a moment to meditate on those summery Hamptons dinners. Moment. One more moment. Last moment. And we’re back.

Back to an existence abundantly appointed with seven-pound Peking duck and seven different varieties of prawn. And cocktails: yes. Sure, but they skew toward the “I enjoy these and will tell no one” end of the spectrum (looking at you, lychee martini).

So your order of operations here goes: guilty-pleasure cocktails at the bar up front, then possible chef’s tasting menu or duck in the skylit back dining room, with a possible audible to the wine cellar for private dinners.

And at the end of it all, a touch of wisdom in the form of a dirty chocolate fortune cookie.

Why, where do you go for advice?