Leisure

Labor Play

Take Someone You Shouldn’t Be With Here

Pretend we slid this under your door. And that the handwriting is encrypted. Now commit these five remote mountain inns to memory. For their own reasons, they’re great places to take someone special. Who doesn’t exist. At least as far as any other special someones are concerned. This message will self-destruct in 3... 2...

FOR COMPLETELY DISAPPEARING

Len Foote Hike Inn

The Agenda: The inn is only accessible by a five-mile hike, so you’ll have to cross streams, navigate ridges and keep your eyes on the prize.
The Hidden Agenda: Complete and total seclusion. There aren’t even any outlets in the rooms. It’s just you, nature and no one asking any questions.

FOR THE DISCERNING SKINNY DIPPER

The Ridges Resort and Marina

The Agenda: You’re staying at a resort in a marina, so you’ve got the shores of Lake Chatuge, a salt-water mineral swimming pool and a pier all at your fingertips.
The Hidden Agenda: The sun will go down. Your suits will still be drying. You... should definitely take this opportunity to go swimming again.

FOR THE MASSAGE BLINDSIDE

Serenity in the Mountains

The Agenda: Complete relaxation. You’re staying in a suite that’s equipped with a jacuzzi tub and plush spa robes (wearing them: optional).
The Hidden Agenda: Turns out, you’re also adjacent to a spa. Reserve the private loft for an hour-and-a-half couples massage. Or a “We’re not labeling anything” massage.

FOR THE RECREATIONAL FACILITATOR

Barnsley Resort

The Agenda: Getting to know each other at a nice, unassuming European-village-style resort. Important: there’s a wet bar in your room.
The Hidden Agenda: Arm yourselves with cocktails and spend the day playing bocce, horseshoes and badminton. You’ll win trust and admiration. And probably bocce, horseshoes and badminton.

FOR THE LONG NIGHT IN

The Dillard House

The Agenda: Drop off your things in the fireplace suite, head down to the restaurant and exchange knowing looks over a Southern-inspired menu and some champagne.
The Hidden Agenda: Your room has a wood-burning stone fireplace and a four-poster bed. So maybe get that champagne to go.