It’s Monday.

And if you haven’t noticed, it’s not very nice out.

So let’s forget today altogether and fast-forward right to the weekend. Specifically, where you’ll be dancing this Friday...

Introducing Guilt, the gold-trimmed new face of the totally gutted and renovated Pearl space, opening Friday in the Theatre District.

Picture it: it’s 10pm on Friday. On your arms: the cast of an Austrian exotic dance troupe on holiday in the city. Your objective: to find them the newest underground sin-bin in a town where new nightclubs are something of a dying breed.

So, you’ll bring them here. And after bro-hugging the doorman, you’ll emerge amongst the burgundy-toned interior for a little martini-ing and a lot of rump shaking on the 36-by-24 dance floor (luckily, it’s the same size as the one in your penthouse).

But should you not be in the mood to groove to the top-shelf DJ talent from Miami and Vegas right away, you’ll claim a few gold couches or a VIP lounge while your new friends get freaky on the floor.

Just remember: it’s never wise to make an Austrian wait.