In the past 362 days, a lot has happened—some new guy became president, Tiger Woods double-bogeyed with some cocktail waitresses and Kanye West let Taylor Swift finish. But in case those trifling matters distracted you from the important things, here's a handy list of the most earth-shattering things to happen this year:
If you're celebrating New Year's with a special someone, you might owe it to this app—it sends personalized, romantic emails and texts to your significant other at random, so you don't have to remember to do it. Not that you would ever need such a thing...
This kit came with everything you needed to trick your boss into thinking you have a child—crayon drawings, fake doctor's notes and (of course) a framed photo of your little treasure. If your attendance record dipped in the past few months, you're welcome.
Maybe it's the slowed down economy, maybe it's our new, mellow commander-in-chief, or maybe it's just your undying thirst for novelty sodas with punning, illicit-sounding names. Whatever it is, after a few years of pumped-up energy drinks—with names like Mega-Mega Charge Sauce—your soda took a well-deserved break. Even if you didn't.
There remained one surefire way to deliver a sartorial eff-you to the man: embrace the rebel style of the '50s and '60s. The best new places to get it: these two new online purveyors of genuine American cool, where you could find, say, a chambray tie or a camo laptop case, both made in the USA.
If there's one thing in this world that needs no improvement, it's Jessica Alba. But if there's another, it's lingerie—and yet, this slight, bright adjustment brought a little extra glow into our lives this year. Not that any ladies you know needed it...
There's nothing new about funny websites. And yet, this particular site—which resurfaced ancient and bizarre family photos—stood out for its sheer, hilarious consistency. Featuring a family dressed alike and straddling a tree has a way of doing that.
When the history books get written, 2009 might go down as the year when it became perfectly acceptable to smell like whiskey. Or opium. Credit experimental perfumers like the Portland General Store (who supplied the hooch) and Nasomatto, who supplied the opium—after smuggling it out of Afghanistan. Effort well spent.
So this was the year you finally got your big break, appearing in movies next to Oscar winners like Hanks, Brando and, uh, the gopher from Caddyshack. Granted, you were in your living room, but still—this movie answer to karaoke justified all that dabbling in Method you did in college.
Hey—it's a living.
