Manhattanites are so put upon. Can’t even get a Dale Talde restaurant to frequent. What kind of life is that?

Oh, what’s that you say, world?

Now there’s Massoni, a proudly inauthentic Italian hotel restaurant and bar from Mr. Talde, opening Monday at the Arlo NoMad? Excellent.

By “inauthentic” we mean that they’re doing stuff like Vietnamese beef shank agnolotti, which is like an Italian version of pho. Beef tartare cannoli is also an option, and we’re pretty sure that’s new to the world. There are square pan pizzas too, which hew a little closer to traditional Italian-ish options, if you’re a purist.

Anyway, stepping into this space is an experience. Jimmy Stewart is there. Graffiti is too. In the dining room, there’s what appears to be an exhausted pope. You can see said things in the slideshow.

But there’s a divide and conquer element to this whole place. Because upstairs you’ll find BARlo, a bar, and a three-seasons terrace which is currently accepting applicants to sit in its very furry chairs and admire its map-covered walls (look at that here). There you might want to consider the very green Forest Hills cocktail—rosemary-infused gin, Thai basil, fresh lemon and honey in a glass with a stem that’s a hawk.

Birds of pray are criminally underused in the glass world.