Nightlife

Bubbling Up

How to Win a Champagne War

War is an ugly thing. Except when it’s fought with champagne. Then it’s beautiful. So when it comes to champagne wars—i.e., that bottle-buying game of one-upmanship that occasionally goes on at clubs—it’s good to come well-armed. With knowledge. And possibly a Black Card.

DEFCON 5

Bevy

Opening Salvo: $150 Piper Sonoma.
Return Fire: $725 Louis Roederer Cristal. Comes with girls holding sparklers and a great big thank-you.
Secret Weapon: $2,250 Armand de Brignac Ace of Spades Rosé. Served in a gilded bottle. And every server is at your service—with sparklers. Victory is yours.

DEFCON 4

RM Champagne Lounge

Opening Salvo: $90 Bérêche Pere et Fils Brut Réserve.
Return Fire: $236 Chartogne-Taillet Cuvée Sainte-Anne Brut. Order a shellfish tower for effect.
Secret Weapon: $1,500 Jacques Selosse Millésme Brut, ’99. Call ahead for patio seating and arrange for the cork to be sabered off. Popping a cork: so passé.

DEFCON 3

Studio Paris

Opening Salvo: $300 Moët Chandon, Impérial.
Return Fire: $7,500 Veuve Clicquot, Yellow Label Brut. Accompanying your 15-liter bottle: a parade of sexy servers with sparklers.
Secret Weapon: $21,000 Dom Pérignon Luminous, ’96. The glow-in-the-dark label on this double magnum is so bright, you can read your bill with it. If you dare...

DEFCON 2

Cuvée

Opening Salvo: $500 Veuve Clicquot Yellow Label Magnum.
Return Fire: $575 Dom Pérignon Luminous. With sparklers. And a table in the center of the room.
Secret Weapon: $5,600 Armand de Brignac Ace of Spades Rosé. The music stops and the theme from, say, Rocky plays. Bring your own Paulie.

DEFCON 1

Parliament

Opening Salvo: $350 Perrier-Jouët Belle Epoque Brut.
Return Fire: $4,400 Krug Grande Cuvée. And a seat in the middle of the room.
Secret Weapon: $5,000 (and up) 21 Champagne Salute. It’s 21 bottles of whatever you demand. An artsy video plays. A light show begins. Somewhere, Robin Leach smiles.