You’ve got no problem learning about tai chi.

You’d just like to do it from a celebrated expert on the matter. Like Jeff Lebowski.

Or failing him: an actual Shaolin kung fu master from China.

Become centered with Master Hu Tai Chi, a limited-space, two-day engagement of tai chi, meditation and tea tasting, accepting reservations now for the end of the month at the Spa at Mandarin Oriental.

Think of this as your own Matrix-y training program, only instead of Laurence Fishburne, your instructor is Hu, a Shaolin master in town from China. The day starts with you being led through the secrets of tai chi (expect a lot of slow arm movements and breathing), followed by a tea tasting in the lobby lounge (posh hotel lobbies have always served as your monastery grounds).

The whole thing ends with some qigong meditation (more breathing, spiritual alignment, healing) and probably you emerging with a blistering inner spirit (chances of unlocking the riddles of existence: 50/50).

But if you’d prefer to handle your mind-body balancing in private, you’ll be happy to hear he’s doing a few individual sessions. Meaning: just you, in a room, training with a master.

Next up: evasive driving lessons from Ryan Gosling.