Gold.

It’s the Barry White of precious metals.

And over the years, its timeless beauty has brought Cleopatra to her knees. Forged entire empires. Even inspired the Goonies to take on the perilous booby traps of One-Eyed Willie.

And now, someone is going to rub it all over your face...

Introducing the Umo 24-Karat Gold Facial, a two-hour journey of excess that’s pretty much exactly what it sounds like, taking appointments soon and available by Valentine’s Day at Spa Sentio.

If you think this type of facial fete might be your thing, far be it from us to get in your way. But we’re pretty sure you stand to gain a few more... tangible benefits by setting up an afternoon appointment (say, on Valentine’s Day) for the lucky giftee(s) in your life.

Either way, when the time comes, you’ll want to head over to the Westside, casually stroll into the spa and slip into something a bit more comfortable. From there, in between various face and head massages, your goldsmith for the day will apply a paper-thin sheet of 24-karat gold to your face.

And with the help of a little Ultrasonic Nano Mist (just go with it), the flakes will begin to break down before being gently massaged into your skin.

Your date. We meant your date’s skin.