Memorial Day weekends come and go.

Some are relaxing. Some are less so.

And some involve you barreling down the longest urban whitewater course in the world.

We’ll let you guess which kind this one is...

Strap in and prepare to board the Whitewater Express, a new urban whitewater course that, yes, happens to be the longest of its kind in the entire damn world, taking reservations now for Saturday’s opening just across the Alabama border.

First, a quick overview. This river used to be stopped up by four dams. Now it’s not. The result: 2.5 miles’ worth of the most monstrous rapids in the southeast. Which also makes it the longest course running through any metropolitan area in the galaxy (yes, Columbus, Georgia, counts).

So some day this weekend, wake up early. Have your annual Memorial Day rib-tips-breakfast-in-bed. Then grab some friends and make the short jaunt to the Georgia-Alabama border.

There, your guide will tell you things. Like how this isn’t for the faint of heart. Or how the rapids can reach up to 13,000 cubic feet per second in volume (the Ocoee River only reaches up to 1,100). How these are the kinds of rapids you’d find in Colorado or Zimbabwe.

And how... well, you stopped listening. You’re thinking about skipping the beginner’s course and going straight to the high-water one instead. It’s faster. And bigger. And insane...

Er.