Engraved invitations. The very best champagne. Caviar by the pound.

A good host knows the grand gestures to make guests feel welcome. The trickier dilemma is what to serve guests who are not.

For that we suggest leaving out a copy of The Bird, a photograph collection celebrating the time-honored tradition of the one-finger salute—and the perfect message to get any unvitees out of your living room, and back on the road.

From the kooky publishing division of Jack Spade, The Bird is the result of a simple premise: the authors/photographers took a drive through the Pennsylvania countryside and asked other motorists to flip them the bird. What they received back was a magnificent flock of bashful birds, emphatic birds, even double-barreled birds (Flight of the Conchords has nothing on these drivers). But, in possibly a good sign for humanity, they were all executed with a smile.

With any luck, your departing intruders will feel just as jovial.

And the door won't hit 'em on the way out…