Food & Drink

You Have Grilling Problems, We Have Grilling Solutions

All the Tools, Meat and Booze You Need Whilst Properly Denaturing Proteins

By Hadley Tomicki ·
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Photo: LukaTDB via Getty Images
We’ve spent long hours over a sizzling heat source this summer. All in the interest of bringing you the latest finds that can turn your next gathering around the grill into a most memorable bacchanal. And maybe a little because we like eating copious amounts of meat while getting buzzed with our friends. So hey, everyone wins.

Anyway, here are some simple solutions to your common barbecue party problems using the most advanced developments in grilling technology. Not to mention, a few new and interesting accoutrements...

The Problem: You have nowhere to store your tools.
The Solution: A magnetic knife strip can easily do the trick, though Char-Broil makes it simpler with its own inexpensive, magnetic tool holder.

The Problem: It’s getting dark and you can’t see what the hell you’re doing.
The Solution: The Grillbeam. That is, combination spatula-and-tongs strapped with a flashlight. It can also open your beers. Because it should.

The Problem: You have a great gas grill. But occasionally desire the taste of smoke and charcoal.
The Solution: Napoleon’s Cast Iron Charcoal and Smoker Tray, which goes directly on your gas grill’s burners so you can cook over live coals.

The Problem: Your charcoal chimney is not legally insane.
The Solution: The Chimney of Insanity from Claw Dragon, which lights your charcoal faster than its peers, who also don’t have cool heavy metal names.

The Problem: Flimsy grill brushes that are warped and ineffective long after a single scrub.
The Solution: The Grand Grill Daddy, essentially a steam iron for your grill that leaves your grates sparkling in seconds while standing up to heavy, prolonged use.

The Problem: You want to make ribs. But you really just want to eat ribs.
The Solution: BBQ Hero Ribs, racks of baby backs dry-rubbed and smoked, then mailed to your door, so all you have to do is reheat them on the grill for a few minutes before eating them/taking credit for them.

The Problem: Barbecue sauce. Ew.
The Solution: Hak’s BBQ Sauce, from celebrity meat overlord Sharone Hakman, coming in nuanced flavors like smoked maple mustard and habanero pineapple.

The Problem: Your rub lacks charisma.
The Solution: For the Love of Rubs puts an artisan spin on its spicing, with notes of citrus and cardamom in its hickory rub. Plus, the containers look like a cover of Daniel Clowes’ Eightball.

The Problem: Your guests want red wine. You kind of want bourbon. But you also kind of want red wine.
The Solution: Cooper & Thief, a red wine blend aged in ex-bourbon barrels for noticeable whiskey notes. Sort of like the Reese's cup of wine and bourbon.
Hadley Tomicki

Hadley Tomicki lives in Los Angeles. He is probably going nowhere on the 10 Freeway this very second.

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